Look, I love dogs.  I admit it: I even cried when I watched Old Yeller.

 

But I'm sick and tired of the lack of respect shown by owners of dogs left to their own devices.  Dogs put outside to raise hell and bark at the grass growing or a bird flying by.  Dogs that love to harmonize with sirens in the distance at 11:55 pm.  Dogs monitoring the activities of the paperboys, waking me up at 6:10 am on a Sunday morning.

 

I don't hold the dogs responsible; it's the owners fault and they've got to have their feet held to the fire if they're going to allow their prized pets to make life miserable for anyone unfortunate enough to live within earshot.  I covered this topic in one of my Dallas Morning News columns, as well as for News 8 @ 9/Good Morning Texas, KVIL's Sunday Morning Magazine show and of course, my radio show on KFI/Los Angeles.  Don't despair!  Because you asked for it, here's the sample letter to be sent to the dog owners. 

 

And I get even more irritated by teenaged boys, thinking with their little heads and cranking their stereos up loud enough to rival anything heard at the end of the runways at LAX or DFW airports.  Why in the hell do these young men equate a booming, bass-enhanced car stereo with machismo, pray tell?  These dumb-asses are setting themselves up for $500 tickets, as well as extra police scrutiny, something young men that are frequently and illegally in possession of alcohol or other recreational enhancements really don't want.  And yes, this topic was also covered in my Dallas Morning News column as well...so here's the sample letter to fire off to these young men, or better yet, to their parents--the usual owners of their vehicles, anyway.

 

Some words to the wise on both of these subjects:

    1) Use all [free] public records at your disposal to get the necessary information to send off your letters.  Check out property appraisal websites for homeowner information; pay sites like www.publicdata.com will help you pop vehicle registration info.

    2) Don't waste your time writing/sending these letters unless you plan on sending them via Certified Mail.  It's well worth the $2.94 (rates as of April '02) to mail these letter with impact.

    3) If you think you could be in harm of retaliation by your neighbor or the punks with the stereos?  The cost of increasing the security around your home/property is nothing thanks to today's affordable electronics.  Wanna go to Ben's choice for surveillance equipment?  Check out www.x10.com

Okay Class: Let's Review And Do Some Homework First